Last Updated on August 6, 2022 by Ellen Christian
This is a look at how compliments make you feel depending on how they’re said. Everyone loves to be complimented. “That’s such a pretty sweater” or “Your hair looks amazing” can certainly bring a smile to my face on even the most stressful day. That’s probably true for many women. But, what about compliments that don’t make you feel good?
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How Compliments Make You Feel
Have you ever had a compliment that didn’t make you feel good? Backhanded compliments like “You look good for your age” can be devastating to our self-esteem. Adding on “for your age” takes all of the positivity of the compliment right out of it. Did you know that 82% of women have been told “You look great for your age” in the past year?
Digging a little deeper, the RoC® #ForYourAge study proved that women would rather not be complimented at all than receive one paired with “for your age.” On top of that, over 60% of those surveyed have changed their behavior after being told their actions weren’t “age appropriate.” This speaks to how a few thoughtless words could have such a powerful impact on smart, accomplished, beautiful women.
Let’s make a pledge that starting today, we won’t use the qualifier “for your age” when we offer a compliment. Let’s just tell people they look great, not they look great for their age.
Check out this inspiring video with Actress Thandie Newton and join RoC® by vowing to think twice before using #ForYourAge with a compliment ever again. It’s time that women were told simply that they look great.
“Have you ever received the backhanded compliment, you look good for your age? Well, I have, and I always feel deflated. We can think about how these words, which we totally take for granted, really make us feel. Tacking ‘for your age’ onto ‘you look good’ takes the prize out of the reward.”
– Thandie Newton
Ellen is a busy mom of a 24-year-old son and 29-year-old daughter. She owns six blogs and is addicted to social media. She believes you can feel beautiful at any age and any size. She shares healthy, realistic beauty and fashion information geared toward women over 40. If you’d like to work together, email firstname.lastname@example.org to chat.